Well I guess it's time to say farewell to everyone.
My IGN was ShadowQu33n, Daggerz0r, and ShadowL0rd.
But, most of you know me as the ego-whore.
I'm sorry I ego'd, raged, and used racist words *especially against jews*.
I'm sorry I didn't show you all who I really am....
The only person I can proudly say knew who I really was, was probably Weed.
I only met him 2 days ago and we clicked like best friends.
He never judged me for my ego, my raging, or my racist words.
I told him everything about me that I could possibly tell anyone.
It was a great relief to release everything without putting any amount of anger behind it.
But, during the past few days I've been thinking about life and how important it is for me at my age.
For those of you who don't know me, let me explain who I am.
My name is Noah Dann... I'm 14 years old, and I live in Port Orange, Florida. I had a very good life up until I was 8. When I was 8 years old my life changed for the worst... My older brother of age 13 died on his birthday from a motocross accident where he died on impact in his new bike, my father died of cancer, my grandfather died of a heart attack, my grandmother died of lung cancer from smoking, and my great grandmother died of natural causes. All of this happened in the same year and not very far apart month-wise either. After my father died no one could support my mom so my family became very poor. When I was 10 we had just been kicked out of our house because we couldn't pay rent and life didn't get any better. Me and my family lived with my mom's parents for a couple of years. At the age of 11 I had met a girl who was 13 at the time. I got her pregnant at a party and didn't know what to do. She ended up getting an abortion without telling me and I was crushed because that was my own flesh and blood she destroyed, even if I was only 11, she then ditched me for another guy who was 16. The next day I went to church and met my current girlfriend. When I was 12 my mom met someone who was wealthy but didn't necessarily treat us right... but he got us by. She married him 3 days after my birthday. At the age of 12 to 13 my step-father beat me on a regular basis and threatened to hurt my mom if I told anyone that he beat me. I am now 14, my step-father beat me on my birthday and I couldn't take it. He beat me and I went into the kitchen and got a knife and told him if he ever hit me again I would kill him. He then told me to leave. I packed up my bags in my bedroom and I told my mother I would come back for her and my little brother one day. I left my home and headed to my best friend's house. I have not seen my family for almost a whole year now. Now here is the good part for people who think my story is bad, after about 2 weeks of living with my friend's family, they bought me my first laptop. My friend told me about ijji GunZ and I decided I didn't like it. He then told me about private servers... I went to a private server website and found FGunZ. I began to play and began to make friends, for once in my life I felt like I had finally met a friendly place to go when I want to feel wanted. Here is when it gets bad again... After losing my first clan war, I began to get called noob by my clan.... I felt unwanted.... I began to ego when I killed the eziest of people just to feel like I was something special. I lost all of my friends and gained more enemies. I then donated for the first time and killed even more people and egod.... causing more enemies to add me to their list. I then quit FGunZ for a couple of months, and rejoined in November. I had changed over those months that I left, but once I came back, the people who hated me had never forgiven me completely and I began to ego. Now we get good again! 2 days ago, I met someone who somehow resisted the urge to talk back when I egod... I decided to investigate... he befriended me and told me about who he really is and how he thought of things. I began to change again, and I told him almost everything, some of which is in this post! That person was Weed. He is probably the only person in this game who has seen the complete and utter 100% of my real side. Anyway, to stop boring you I will cut to the chase, the reasons for why I am quitting are summed up into 3 reasons....
1. I want to be closer to God.
I have become so addicted to the computer that I have lost almost all of the faith I had in my religion, and I want to become closer to God. I want to know that when I die, I will have everlasting life and not be tormented for the rest of my life.
2. I have lost sight of education.
One of the reasons I quit for a couple months last time, was because of grades. It is beginning to happen again and I have realized that it will take more than just quitting for a couple months to get over this mile-stone.
3. My girlfriend of 3 years is moving.
I know this may sound stupid to some of you but, my girlfriend has lived 45 minutes away from me by car for 3 years now and somehow we've managed. I only see her once a week, and sometimes even only once a month. She lives with her mom and step-dad and her step-dad is acting "over-protective" of her to set an example for her mom. He will not let her come to my house 'til she is 16. I've been going to her house almost once a week for 3 years now.... she has never seen my house or anything inside of it. She has never seen my mother or my step-father or my little brother, but now she is moving in walking distance of my house, and I will see her everyday and she will be able to come to my house whenever she wants. I've completely committed 120% to her everyday that I've known her. I know I'm 14 years old but I've made up my mind that she's worth every ounce of my energy.
Now, I'd like to say farewell to a couple friends of mine who probably don't even consider me an acquaintance let alone a friend at all... but to me they are still my friends....
First, I'd like to say goodbye to Weed. You're my only true friend on GunZ currently... and I'm glad to say that you can always contact me on MSN bro ;D
Second, BlueTank... I've had some rough times with you, nothing too serious, but you've been a good mate to me through the months =)
Third, TvvisT, probably my favorite clan leader of all time... we didn't get along in the end but we still made it work out....
Fourth, HaseoPKK, I haven't really got to know you yet but I've come to idol you and your proness =) you have been an inspiration through my GunZ experience... I hope I don't embarrass you with that haha...
Fifth, Dagger, I haven't known you too long, but you are the best d-styler I've ever met..... we had a bad moment last night because of my ego and I'm sorry about that.... I won't forget what you've taught me....
Sixth, Jakanadin, you were the most helpful Forum Mod for me.... you were always there when I needed you and you helped me when I got hacked.... I thank you......
Seventh, BunnyChaser, I know you think I'm one of the biggest egos on FGunZ and the noobiest.... but I've come to grow on your knowledge of the rules. You are like the guard of FGunZ if that makes sense. Anyway, I don't know why I'll miss you so much, but you put an impact on me in FGunZ.
That is pretty much it I guess, if you have any questions, post them if you want... if you just want to rage on me one last time go ahead you can do that to... I deserve it.
Anyway, I'm only leaving the game...... I'll probably stay on forums and talk to people and what not, say hello every once in awhile.... I just won't be as active as I should be......
Anyway, goodbye everyone... I'll miss you all. Oh, and I'll probably stay on forums for a bit longer while I think about selling my PC. Anyway, if anyone would like to comment, go ahead.
